Where God is leading me?

”Why Russia?”
I've heard this question from many.
Giving answer for that can take long, and explaining what Russia means for me can be hard. How to open my heart to the listener in way, that he could really understand what I mean?
”Russia is in my heart” - What more I could say?

When I started my 7 grade, nine years ago, I would have liked to start learn russian language. Again one of my grazy ideas, i thought. Later I wouldn't be interested anymore.
Russian course what they offer in my school never started ,cause number of students wasn't enought to start new group. I didnt start my russan learning. Not yet.

After few years, when I went to high school, door to my russian path opened. I had now chance to study language of my dear neighbor country, поехали, Lets go then!
My name was now in the list of students who start learn russian language from the beginning.

I struggled to pronounce seven different ”S- sounds”. С,Ч, Ж, З, Щ,Ш,Ц
Everything sounded same for me at the beginning. Slow but sure it all started to make more sense.
With trying and failing, trying again, and little by little going forward, I were able to overcome obstacles. I never was the best, and my grades were average or below that, but I had passion.
I got prize after first year of studies from my russian language teacher, cause I was so excited to learn more.

First time I visited St.Petersburg when I new only few words and phrases. I knew what ment ”Sposibo”(thank you), and using phrase ”Moshno paket” in every store, after 3 days I owned 15 plastic bags more than before. ”can I have plastic bag”

After my high school my russin skills and learning had holiday. There wasnt chance to study more, and I had time in life, that russian learning wasnt number one in my list of what I should do.
Straight away when I started in my university in city called Mikkeli I was excited to continue my russian studies. University offered language courses, but also there was possible to study russian history, culture an religion. 'Russian path' – course had 8 lessons, each was 2 or 3 hours long,
and had different topic. That course gave me lots of knowledge about Russia. I enjoyed.
With my russian group I travelled to St. Petersburg twice, and now after few years of studies I were able to really say something in restaurants and streets. It wasnt waste of time what I spent learning russian, I was getting better.

Once I started to wonder this question, Why Russia, why you have passion for that nation?
I really had to think reasons for that. From somewhere that passion started, but where, in what situation? I couldnt remember any concrete memory, passion just started. No one didnt push me, or force me to study, I didnt start to like that nation because of someone else, motivation came somewhere inside...
We were talking about calling in our lives, in youth group meeting. ”Where God has called you to be?”- was the question. We shared our feelings. My answer was something like this : ”For some reason Russia has been my passion for now about 7 years, and always when someone asks 'why' I couldnt answer. Maybe Russia is my calling, Maybe God has given that nation to my heart.”

Something happened inside my mind. Maybe that is the answer. Its not coinsidense that I've kept on studing russian even it has been very hard, and many tests I failed. And I havent got many chance to even use that language. After frustrated times I still had power to go forward. What gave that power to me? Who gave me more passion for Russia? God?

Same time I started to pray for my next autumn, cause I had this grazy idea, that I should go to DTS, disclipeship training school, to Vladivostok, Russia. Insane!
But somewhere I took that idea, by accident found web site of that school which was located near the japan ocean, Far far east russia. End of the world.

God gave peace to my heart, and I knew that is my next step, DTS in Vladivostok.
Three months of lecture phase, learning about God, and then next three months outreach, putting into practise what we learnt during lectures. Missionfields.
I sent applications and kept on praying.
When It was sure that I was going ,was time to tell people.
My mom was shocked, friends surprised, and many people doupted. ”maybe Heidi is just little bit too excited about this 'God thing', soon she will be down on earth...”
But when you know, that God has put something into your heart, no ones opinion cannot steal that inner voice, and passion from you. I wasnt just rebellious and grazy when I decided to go, there was over half year prayers behind, before my trip to DTS even started.

Sebtember 17. friday. Plane from Helsinki left, through St.Petersburg and Moscow to Vladivostok.
Step towards unknown. This was that I was waiting for, opportunity to live someday in Russia, more than for one weekend as tourist. Live there for real.

After I arrived to Vladivostok I started to think, was my passion still there. Maybe this reality could kill it, and maybe my dream to live in Russia was now behind when I really was there.
It wasnt, I didnt disappoint.
Vladivostok became my second home. Trips by russian bus was first hard, but I got more balance, Luckily I didnt fall down too often, friends were there for me, holding me up ;)
City of over half million people didnt have even Mc Donalds, but I didnt miss that at all.
On the streets and buildings I could sense something that I missed in St. Petersburg. Cities which are more near europe, have become more western, and russian culture is not seen so clearly.
In vladivostok I really felt what is to be in russia, It is very nice and cozy place to live.
Once I was buying cd in one store, I was really surpised how friendly they were, helped me and were very patience, even my russian skills wasnt so perfect. I can get good customer service also in Russia :D !
Also churches, and one of them especially became important to me. One day I will go back there to see my friends..

After our outreach through China- Thailand and Myanmar we arrived back to home...
To Russia! It really felt that I was now back home, which was first really weird, I didint expect that.
Home is of course Finland for me, but home of my heart will remain in Russia.

"Why Russia?"
I've heard this question from many.
Giving answer for that can take long, and explaining what Russia means for me can be hard. How to open my heart to the listener in way, that he could really understand what I mean?
”Russia is in my heart – always ”